Lessons In Negotiating From Youngsters: Choosing The Best Approach For Your Sales Negotiations.

Have you ever tried to reason with with a 2 year old?

Were you surprised with their negotiation skills?

Well, my son is now almost 2 and half years old and has suddenly learnt that he has a will - a very strong will at that. Typical of children at this stage, he is far more interested in getting what he wants than with complying with his mother or father's wishes.

It seems to me that as children we tend to be assertive rather than accommodating in our communication with others. We are only interested in meeting our own needs and wants rather than satisfying the needs and desires of others around us.

It is only as we mature that we believe the world does not in fact revolve around us and that we have to fit into our environment in a responsible and positive way. We learn that we can not only do as we wish but also have to consider the rights, feelings and desires of others.

This made me think about the 5 foundational negotiation approaches and how you can deploy them to underpin the achievement of your negotiation goals.

1.Competitive negotiation

This is a style of negotiation that is primarily assertive and focused on your own needs, desires and objectives.

2.Accommodating negotiation

This is a mode of negotiation that is predominantly concerned only with the needs, desires and goals of your counterpart whilst ignoring your own needs. Sales training seminars often teach this negotiation approach as the most suitable strategy.

3.Compromising negotiation

Probably the most famous of all negotiation strategies. This is a style of negotiation where you meet your counterparts halfway. You get some of your needs, wants and targets met and you reciprocate for your counterparts.

4.Collaborative negotiation

This is a mode of negotiation where you attempt to satisfy all of the needs, desires and targets of your counterparts and they do the same for you.

5.Avoiding negotiation

This is a way of interaction where you do not regard negotiation as the best way to achieve your targets.

The important factors which will determine which of the above approaches should be in your negotiations is to answer the following 3 questions:

a.How important is an ongoing relationship to you?

If the relationship is important, then you will not be able to be only assertive, you will have to at least compromise with your counterparts. If you do not address the needs of your counterparts, then it is unlikely that a meaningful relationship will develop.

b.How many options are available to you?

If you have a host of alternatives available, you can afford to be more competitive. On the other hand, if you have only one option, then you will be forced to be more accommodating.

c.How much time do you have available?

If you have time on your side, then you can certainly be more competitive. The less time available to you, the more accommodating you will have to be.

As you can see, it is important to ask yourself these three questions before you start negotiating so that you can select the strategy most suited to the situation at hand rather than just following a negotiation strategy based only on your preference.

It is also important to remember that you should be flexible in your approach. You may want to amend your strategy as new information becomes available during your negotiations.

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